Top 5 Things Waiters Want to Say When Someone Orders Water

This is a follow-up post. Click here to learn why ordering water at a restaurant is so taboo.

As a waiter, there were many times I had to bite my tongue when a customer was annoying me. Like when someone wants to taste a sample of the Bolognese sauce before ordering. Or when someone yells a request to you from the other side of the restaurant.  Or when you ask someone what they’d like to drink and they say, “water”. I shudder.

Here are the Top 5 things waiters want to say when someone orders water:

5. Sure- just put your head under the sink in the washroom.
4. Sorry, we’re all out.
3. The #1 ingredient in all of our fountain drinks is water…. Shall I get you one of those?
2. Our taps are laced with arsenic. Would you prefer something else?
1. Sure- just bite your cheeks and swallow some saliva!

Help me to make this a Top 10 list! Leave a comment below!